They Say, "Distance Makes the Heart Grow Stronger"
They say it, do you believe it?.... I do! I have not posted in a long time, so I figured I would resurface with a topic that is dear to my heart, Long-distance relationships! My current relationship has pretty much been a long-distance one from day one (celebrated 1 year last month). And now we may both be in transition which will keep us apart for at least another year. So what do you do to make a long distance relationship last? Should you do any more than if you're with someone in the same town or someone you live with? I think there are added measures needed to ensure that the relationship can withstand the distance. For example, communication is key in any relationship, but even more in one when you don't see eachother as much. We make a point to talk to eachother at least twice a day if not more. Make time to visit, we try to see eachother at least once a month and it's worked out thus far with trips for work and personal vacations.
I'm curious to know how many of you out there are in long distance relationships, and what do you see as challenges and what techniques have you used to deal with those challenges?
Until another topic pops in my head....midwestbrutha, out!
posted by midwestbrutha at
6:57 PM
30 Comments:
I've done the long-distance thing. Long ago. I don't like it. I like daily-but-not-suffocating companionship. Like Janet Jackson in "I Miss U Much": I'm not the kind of girl who likes to be alone ... .
12:56 PM
My experience in distance relationships (long or short) leads me to believe that it definitely takes TWO people who have a lot of understanding and lots of love and trust. I don't think you necessarily have to do more than you would ordinarily in a healthy relationship, but I think distance can be a good motivation to keep things fresh and interesting. It takes energy and creativity to keep a close, intimate relationship when you are not physically together. I have found that absence can definitely bring two hearts closer together and help build a good foundation for the future. But it's not always an easy road and it's definitely not for everyone. Best wishes on your new transition in your relationship.
1:23 PM
There are many components to a successful long distance relationship. I can think of three immediately. One, having a verified devotion to the relationship; what are the constraints of the relationship? What are the liberties of the relationship? Two, there needs to be a concrete establishment of trust. Having trust that the other partner will be socially responsible no matter what type of situation may occur. Three, knowing yourself as an individual and balancing that with your dependence for the other partner.
I am not a fan of (nor experienced in) long distance relationships, but luckily location does not determine the success of a relationship. If both parties are willing to sacrifice, practice self-control and deal with the agitation that comes along with having a long distance relationship, then things will go well.
You ask "Does Absence Make the Heart Grow Stronger/fonder"? It definitely increases the quality of the relationship if it works, but if it fails, it can definitely make the heart grow weary.
10:25 AM
There are many components to a successful long distance relationship. I can think of three immediately. One, having a verified devotion to the relationship; what are the constraints of the relationship? What are the liberties of the relationship? Two, there needs to be a concrete establishment of trust. Having trust that the other partner will be socially responsible no matter what type of situation may occur. Three, knowing yourself as an individual and balancing that with your dependence for the other partner.
I am not a fan of (nor experienced in) long distance relationships, but luckily location does not determine the success of a relationship. If both parties are willing to sacrifice, practice self-control and deal with the agitation that comes along with having a long distance relationship, then things will go well.
You ask "Does Absence Make the Heart Grow Stronger/fonder"? It definitely increases the quality of the relationship if it works, but if it fails, it can definitely make the heart grow weary.
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7:14 AM
So long as you're both on the same page (and it sounds like you are), a long distance relationship can work well. Problems start if one of you moves on and doesn't tell the other. Just promise each other that you'll be honest about where your head and heart are, and that if problems arise you'll talk about them. Sometimes, being on the phone rather than face-to-face can make it tough to discuss things. When you're there in-person, sometimes a look or a hug can say enough to diffuse an argument before it starts. Face-to-face, you can also read those subtle subconscious signs about what's going on in the other person's head :-)
I've tried long distance and it didn't work for me, but that's because the above factors weren't there. Given the right guy, I'm sure I could make it work.
5:11 PM
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Hey, I am so glad that I came across this topic. I am new to a long distance relationship, 2months. It scares me. I trust him but...it gets hard for me so I know it must be hard for him. We decided to make monthly trips to visit each other. We talk everyday..well we speak everyday, sometimes I think we need to have phone dates. Not talking on our way somewhere or inbetween meetings, or right before bed. I think we need to talk, ya know real conversation at least once a week. Anyway I am glad to see that its working for you, it gives me hope.
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Start Over : When couples first get together, everything is new and exciting.
Lighten Up : Often when couples have gone through or are going through some bumpy spots in their relationship, things tend to get serious.
Night of Passion : Intimacy and passion in relationships is not only important but also healthy.
Cuddle Time : When couples first start dating, cuddling is usually a part of their everyday existence.
Make the Women Feel Good : Just like men, woman love feeling good about themselves.
Showing Love : Although hearing the words, I love you is special and important.
Realistic Expectations : No matter how wonderful and flawless your mate seems, no one is perfect.
Go on a Date : Especially for married couples, but even for some dating couples, start dating.
Control Your Anger : Every relationship has difficulties, and sometimes, there can be some intense arguments.
I Forgive You : If something has happened in your relationship causing the trust to waiver, you will have many things to work through.
Day at the Movies : Have a movie marathon some rainy or cold Saturday.
Dinner by the Fire : Order in some of your favorite food, open a bottle of fine wine, light some candles.
A Day at the Spa : Show your appreciation for the hard work that takes.
Keep in Touch : It is important that you keep in touch with each other often.
Motivate Each Other : Find a mutual incentive that will motivate both of you.
Adore your Mate : Appreciate and love them for the person they are.
Make Eye Contact : Think back to the first time you saw your now mate.
Respect Privacy : When two people come together in a relationship, each person has their own set of history.
Be Flexible : There will be times when your mate is right and times when you are right.
Encourage Friendships : Men, unlike women, have a more difficult time in developing close friendships with other men.
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Start Over : When couples first get together, everything is new and exciting.
Lighten Up : Often when couples have gone through or are going through some bumpy spots in their relationship, things tend to get serious.
Night of Passion : Intimacy and passion in relationships is not only important but also healthy.
Cuddle Time : When couples first start dating, cuddling is usually a part of their everyday existence.
Make the Women Feel Good : Just like men, woman love feeling good about themselves.
Showing Love : Although hearing the words, I love you is special and important.
Realistic Expectations : No matter how wonderful and flawless your mate seems, no one is perfect.
Go on a Date : Especially for married couples, but even for some dating couples, start dating.
Control Your Anger : Every relationship has difficulties, and sometimes, there can be some intense arguments.
I Forgive You : If something has happened in your relationship causing the trust to waiver, you will have many things to work through.
Day at the Movies : Have a movie marathon some rainy or cold Saturday.
Dinner by the Fire : Order in some of your favorite food, open a bottle of fine wine, light some candles.
A Day at the Spa : Show your appreciation for the hard work that takes.
Keep in Touch : It is important that you keep in touch with each other often.
Motivate Each Other : Find a mutual incentive that will motivate both of you.
Adore your Mate : Appreciate and love them for the person they are.
Make Eye Contact : Think back to the first time you saw your now mate.
Respect Privacy : When two people come together in a relationship, each person has their own set of history.
Be Flexible : There will be times when your mate is right and times when you are right.
Encourage Friendships : Men, unlike women, have a more difficult time in developing close friendships with other men.
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Multilingual : English - Chinese Simplified - Chinese Traditional - Dutch - French - German - Greek - Italian - Japanese - Korean - Portuguese - Russian - Spanish
Start Over : When couples first get together, everything is new and exciting.
Lighten Up : Often when couples have gone through or are going through some bumpy spots in their relationship, things tend to get serious.
Night of Passion : Intimacy and passion in relationships is not only important but also healthy.
Cuddle Time : When couples first start dating, cuddling is usually a part of their everyday existence.
Make the Women Feel Good : Just like men, woman love feeling good about themselves.
Showing Love : Although hearing the words, I love you is special and important.
Realistic Expectations : No matter how wonderful and flawless your mate seems, no one is perfect.
Go on a Date : Especially for married couples, but even for some dating couples, start dating.
Control Your Anger : Every relationship has difficulties, and sometimes, there can be some intense arguments.
I Forgive You : If something has happened in your relationship causing the trust to waiver, you will have many things to work through.
Day at the Movies : Have a movie marathon some rainy or cold Saturday.
Dinner by the Fire : Order in some of your favorite food, open a bottle of fine wine, light some candles.
A Day at the Spa : Show your appreciation for the hard work that takes.
Keep in Touch : It is important that you keep in touch with each other often.
Motivate Each Other : Find a mutual incentive that will motivate both of you.
Adore your Mate : Appreciate and love them for the person they are.
Make Eye Contact : Think back to the first time you saw your now mate.
Respect Privacy : When two people come together in a relationship, each person has their own set of history.
Be Flexible : There will be times when your mate is right and times when you are right.
Encourage Friendships : Men, unlike women, have a more difficult time in developing close friendships with other men.
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relationship advice 101 Ways to Build Happy, Lasting Relationships.
Multilingual : English - Chinese Simplified - Chinese Traditional - Dutch - French - German - Greek - Italian - Japanese - Korean - Portuguese - Russian - Spanish
Start Over : When couples first get together, everything is new and exciting.
Lighten Up : Often when couples have gone through or are going through some bumpy spots in their relationship, things tend to get serious.
Night of Passion : Intimacy and passion in relationships is not only important but also healthy.
Cuddle Time : When couples first start dating, cuddling is usually a part of their everyday existence.
Make the Women Feel Good : Just like men, woman love feeling good about themselves.
Showing Love : Although hearing the words, I love you is special and important.
Realistic Expectations : No matter how wonderful and flawless your mate seems, no one is perfect.
Go on a Date : Especially for married couples, but even for some dating couples, start dating.
Control Your Anger : Every relationship has difficulties, and sometimes, there can be some intense arguments.
I Forgive You : If something has happened in your relationship causing the trust to waiver, you will have many things to work through.
Day at the Movies : Have a movie marathon some rainy or cold Saturday.
Dinner by the Fire : Order in some of your favorite food, open a bottle of fine wine, light some candles.
A Day at the Spa : Show your appreciation for the hard work that takes.
Keep in Touch : It is important that you keep in touch with each other often.
Motivate Each Other : Find a mutual incentive that will motivate both of you.
Adore your Mate : Appreciate and love them for the person they are.
Make Eye Contact : Think back to the first time you saw your now mate.
Respect Privacy : When two people come together in a relationship, each person has their own set of history.
Be Flexible : There will be times when your mate is right and times when you are right.
Encourage Friendships : Men, unlike women, have a more difficult time in developing close friendships with other men.
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long distance relationship 101 Ways to Build Happy, Lasting Relationships.
Multilingual : English - Chinese Simplified - Chinese Traditional - Dutch - French - German - Greek - Italian - Japanese - Korean - Portuguese - Russian - Spanish
Start Over : When couples first get together, everything is new and exciting.
Lighten Up : Often when couples have gone through or are going through some bumpy spots in their relationship, things tend to get serious.
Night of Passion : Intimacy and passion in relationships is not only important but also healthy.
Cuddle Time : When couples first start dating, cuddling is usually a part of their everyday existence.
Make the Women Feel Good : Just like men, woman love feeling good about themselves.
Showing Love : Although hearing the words, I love you is special and important.
Realistic Expectations : No matter how wonderful and flawless your mate seems, no one is perfect.
Go on a Date : Especially for married couples, but even for some dating couples, start dating.
Control Your Anger : Every relationship has difficulties, and sometimes, there can be some intense arguments.
I Forgive You : If something has happened in your relationship causing the trust to waiver, you will have many things to work through.
Day at the Movies : Have a movie marathon some rainy or cold Saturday.
Dinner by the Fire : Order in some of your favorite food, open a bottle of fine wine, light some candles.
A Day at the Spa : Show your appreciation for the hard work that takes.
Keep in Touch : It is important that you keep in touch with each other often.
Motivate Each Other : Find a mutual incentive that will motivate both of you.
Adore your Mate : Appreciate and love them for the person they are.
Make Eye Contact : Think back to the first time you saw your now mate.
Respect Privacy : When two people come together in a relationship, each person has their own set of history.
Be Flexible : There will be times when your mate is right and times when you are right.
Encourage Friendships : Men, unlike women, have a more difficult time in developing close friendships with other men.
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relationship 101 Ways to Build Happy, Lasting Relationships.
Start Over : When couples first get together, everything is new and exciting.
Lighten Up : Often when couples have gone through or are going through some bumpy spots in their relationship, things tend to get serious.
Night of Passion : Intimacy and passion in relationships is not only important but also healthy.
Cuddle Time : When couples first start dating, cuddling is usually a part of their everyday existence.
Make the Women Feel Good : Just like men, woman love feeling good about themselves.
Showing Love : Although hearing the words, I love you is special and important.
Realistic Expectations : No matter how wonderful and flawless your mate seems, no one is perfect.
Go on a Date : Especially for married couples, but even for some dating couples, start dating.
Control Your Anger : Every relationship has difficulties, and sometimes, there can be some intense arguments.
I Forgive You : If something has happened in your relationship causing the trust to waiver, you will have many things to work through.
Day at the Movies : Have a movie marathon some rainy or cold Saturday.
Dinner by the Fire : Order in some of your favorite food, open a bottle of fine wine, light some candles.
A Day at the Spa : Show your appreciation for the hard work that takes.
Keep in Touch : It is important that you keep in touch with each other often.
Motivate Each Other : Find a mutual incentive that will motivate both of you.
Adore your Mate : Appreciate and love them for the person they are.
Make Eye Contact : Think back to the first time you saw your now mate.
Respect Privacy : When two people come together in a relationship, each person has their own set of history.
Be Flexible : There will be times when your mate is right and times when you are right.
Encourage Friendships : Men, unlike women, have a more difficult time in developing close friendships with other men.
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